Father's Daughter: Daddy's Love
What for to girls of the daddy?
Usually roles in the family are distributed as follows: Mother is a teacher, father is an inspirer. Mom learns a daughter to be a woman, tells how to dress, cook, walk, quarrel, praise, love. And if the mother can not teach her anything, the girl will easily fill this gap. With Dad it is more difficult - his role can not be played by anybody else. It is the father who should give meaning to mother's teaching: why should a girl be a woman, why should one dress, cook, love? In a relationship with her father, a girl learns to be a woman, and with it she feels herself for the first time. Acceptance of the female essence leaves an imprint on subsequent relationships with men. At first the girl can not even imagine that they are not like Papa. By the time she begins to fall in love (that is, years to four), she already knows who such men are and what kind of relationship they should develop. They should, because if the boy does not correspond to Papa's image, the girl will not even notice him! He will not become for her a representative of the opposite sex, and if their relationship does not remind her of her relationship with the pope, she will call them senseless and boring.
What dad should do to make her daughter grow upConfident and happy woman? Nothing special. The girl is sufficient for your presence and love, and it does not matter at all, in what this love is manifested. Your daughter will feel it intuitively.
Strict to nothing
It is worth saying that Dad's severity is not exactlyWhat the girls need. What is it harmful? Partly because the daughter does not perceive her father as an example for imitation and his exactingness does not stimulate her to learn, but only hurts and repels. If you are strict with your daughter, she will fear you, and this is unlikely to help her in dealing with the opposite sex.
Some competition and the accompanying fear of moreStrong and skilful rival are present not only in relations between men, but also between women. Most often it makes you be more attentive, learn something and better understand your opportunities and boundaries. But in the female-male relationship, such a fear can cause a girl to feel that she is not worthy of love and support, that she needs to work on herself to achieve praise, attention, tenderness. And even if your daughter wins this battle and feels worthy, a man's love can become for her not something for granted, but a kind of trophy.
The coldness of men towards their daughters is oftenIs explained by the fact that they do not know what to do with them. Sometimes a man comes out of the situation, encouraging the boy's boyish habits. Becoming a tomboy, the girl becomes more clear to her father, he is not so afraid to communicate with her. This relationship has a right to exist and usually does not affect the girl's further relationship with the representatives of the opposite sex.
Stages of Relationships
In 2-4 years, the girl begins to understand that she -A woman that a man and a woman are not the same, and that there is a special relationship between them. Usually, after making this discovery, the daughter offers the pope to marry her ... This is a very important point, requiring the man to conduct correctly.
In fact, the girl tells you the following: "I am a woman, you are a man, we love each other, and a loving man and woman usually marry." If at that moment the father explains to the daughter that he is absolutely unpromising for her as a sexual object, but there are other men in the world who can become close to her (and this does not prevent his father from still loving her), then she will give her "Permission" for love and happiness in adulthood.
If the father leaves such conversations or jokes, the girl can get into a difficult situation: she learns that other men are, but do not understand if Dad allows them to love.
No less important moral support is neededTo give to the girl and in teenage age when there comes the moment of discontent with the body, the person, appearance. At this time she expects from her mother "instrumental" help (which and in what situations to talk about how to dress, why smile), but from the pope, as usual, of love and tenderness. She is frightened by the changes that occur with the body, she is not sure that it grows beautiful, so she needs you to tell her compliments more often.